My mother is a wise woman. Every once in a while, I write stuff like that down, and I think she is out there making a note of it in one of her bizzillion bedside notebooks. But it’s truth.
My mother had much advice when I got married. Some of my favorites:
- There will be times in your marriage when you want to rip his clothes off the moment he walks in the door, and there will be times when you will be angry that he has the nerve to breathe the same air as you. It passes. Marriage is a cycle.
- Keep a cast iron skillet on the stove. If he hits you, hit him with that. Let him know that is why you keep it there (for real, I have a skillet on my stove).
- When in doubt, make meatloaf. Men are gross and will eat meatloaf.
But the very very best advice my mother ever gave me, was not about marriage, but how to keep a part of yourself for outside the marriage. You do this, she said, with girlfriends.
When a gaggle of girlfriends came to town last weekend, my son giggled like, well, a 10-year-old, when I referred to them as “girlfriends.”
“Are you going to kiss???”
Good thing Jim was not there, because he would have been all, “Are you? Cool!”
But despite my husband Beavis’ thoughts that our weekend would entail a topless pillow fight, it was really, for me, just more proof that my mother was right.
“Remember,” she said. “You can live without a man. You cannot live without your girlfriends.”
Not that Mom advocates leaving our husbands, but she has a solid point. The guys that went from boyfriends to husbands could leave us and we would be sad. But if our girls left us, we would be crushed.
See what I mean?
Thanks ladies! Especially for the pillow fight!