Foul Mouthed Hooligans

I was browsing the blogs this evening — an event that sounds fairly naughty yet in reality is a sad commentary on my personal life — when I saw that Cynthia over at It All Changes had participated in The Name Game!

Personally, I think anything involving names, games, and any combination of phrases that contain those two words is totally awesome, and I am all for it. In fact, it was the name game where you name a celebrity, then the next person has to name a new celebrity using the first letter of the last name of the person you used (ie, I say Tom Jones, and you say Jennifer Aniston, and I say dude, Jennifer Aniston is not a celebrity and you say IS TOO so I shrug and say, fine, Amy Adams and you then curse my double-A because you cannot think of any other A names even though Alan Alda is just sitting there, waiting for you to spit it out…. that game) is what got Jim and I through a very long Homeland Security delay on the tarmac in Fort Lauderdale in 2005.

I think it might be the fact that I have a relatively uncommon name that makes me interested in names. I wonder if the day will ever come when I experience a Kayla — Kayla is certainly common these days. Among young girls and teens and maybe college seniors. But it was hardly a common name in the 1980′s, save for the one true love of Patch on Days of Our Lives. So while MY Kayla grew up with an uncommon name, she’s seen it become more mainstream. So.. maybe it’ll happen for Marney?

Yeah… no.

Anyway. On to the name game that, according to Cynthia, has been circulating in blog land. And in an awesomely fun way, if I do say so myself.

1. How did your parents decide on your name?

I think we’ve already clearly established that they were drunk. Well, at least that’s what I generally assume. Truth of it is, my name is Patrick Anthony. There was no room for any more vaginas in our household. My mother was desperate to deliver my brother a brother of his own. But alas, it was not meant to be.

The way I understand it, when my parents moved to their first suburban home, one of the neighborhood kids was named Marney. And Mom said, “oh, that’s cute, how do you spell it?” And she said “M-A-R-N-E-Y” and that’s the end of the story. Seriously.

When Patrick Anthony turned out to have no ding-a-ling, Mom said something like “well dammit” then sighed then said “guess we’ll go with Marney” and the doc was like “what’s the middle name” and Mom was all “well we didn’t plan for a girl” and doc was like *blank stare* and Mom said “Lynn. Marney Lynn.”

An hour or so later, Dad had to remind Mom that they already had a child with the middle name Lynn — Amy Lynn. And it’s not like that was so long ago, Amy and I are only two years apart. But the birth certificate was already filled out, so I got a used middle name.

***side note — my parents ages are incorrect on my birth certificate. Dad was 34, and Mom was 31, but it says the OPPOSITE. Don’t tell Trump.***

Anyway, the next thing Mom did was call my brother and apologize for not giving him a brother of his own.

No wonder I am so dramatic. I seriously need therapy after typing all that.

2. Do your initials (first/middle/last) spell anything funny?

Not funny. But before I was married, my first and last initial simply spelled out, ME. Nice and selfish! At high school graduation, me and Melissa E-something had a brief conversation about how we didn’t like that. And once, in grade school, the art teacher hollered out, “ok, who is the smart alec who wrote ‘me’ in the corner of their work” when it was ME because we were supposed to put our initials on it. Man did she feel dumb!

3. Did you take your middle name from childhood or did you drop your middle name & take your maiden name as your middle name?

First, I am wondering how this translates to boy blogs. Or is this girl-only name game? Awesome.

Anyway, I never ever used my afterthought of a middle name. I did, however, take my maiden name as my middle name. I was going to hyphenate, but that would have given me a 15-letter last name (plus hyphen!). So I opted for the Hilary Rodham Clinton route.

4. Are you or will you name your children systematically? (i.e., same first letter, same origin, etc.)

I was not even organized enough to have my children with the same men, let alone have some type of rhyme or reason to their names. I suppose, you could say, I like the old-fashioned names though.

5. Did you decide on baby names as a little girl? Did you stick to them or change your mind?

Apparently, yes, this is a girls only name game!

I always, always, ALWAYS planned on having a girl named Lilly. But, I only had boys. Unlike my mother who was apparently DEVASTATED with the sex of at least one of her babies, I was FINE.

And while I don’t think Hank was a name I loved as a little girl, I definitely knew by the time I hit college that Hank was a name I would like for a boy. See, Hank was my Aunt Lil’s husband. And since Lil was truly an awesome lady (she used to crochet me Barbie clothes, which of course I still have), and I could not name a daughter after her, I did the next best thing and named my first son after her husband, good old Uncle Hank.

As for George — seriously, that was just cute.

6. Does your family have any names that have been passed down through generations?

My mother’s side has only names they pass on by accident. Plenty of ancestors named Henry and George, plus of course Uncle Hank. But it’s more like we just aren’t very original. Except for Marney — the afterthought name.

My brother is a junior, but that stopped.

7. Do you look at the meaning of the name or just the name itself?

Ahh, just the name. Meanings can be too… meaningful.

8. Do you name pets with human names or pet names?

I don’t have a rule. My last two pets were cats, one named Pumpkin, the other named Phyllis. I did have dreams about getting a dog and naming him Fido or Rover, since no one ever REALLY names their dog that but they supposedly the quintessential dog names. But then I discovered that I think pretty much all dogs are actually rabid beings from the deepest depths of hell, and, well, there goes that idea.

9. Are there any names that you have an affinity or dislike for based on a childhood experience/someone you once knew?

Well, a truly wretched gal named Anna terrorized me during parts of high school, so while I don’t immediately expect to be tripped or flicked in the head by all women named Anna, it’s not exactly a name I would choose for a child.

I suppose I might have eventually picked the name Eden though, because I did seriously love Santa Barbara.

10. What are some of your favorite names & why?

Well, there’s Hank. And George. For obvious reasons. Plus Lilly, even though I never got to use it.

Then there’s Sophia because it sounds kind of sexy. And Mary, due to my love of Mary Ann Childers. Other than that, I don’t think I really HAVE any favorite names.

Except, of course, MARNEY. After thought or not, I like my name!

Ok, your turn.  Go play!

*Note ~ which I also stole from Cynthia just to make sure we are CRYSTAL CLEAR here: We are not pregnant in any way shape or form.  This was just for fun.*